New Year often comes with a desire to make those changes, start afresh, have a clean slate. Often people make New Year’s resolutions but without any clear plan to follow through and by February, those resolutions have morphed back into our psyches and we revert to our “old selves”. Disappointed perhaps that we didn’t “try harder”.
Counter intuitively perhaps, if this happens to you, why not take a moment and just breathe; don’t justify why you were unable to follow through nor berate yourself. It really is OK.
OR…. set yourself a clear target. Use S.M.A.R.T. goals (specific, measurable, agreed, reasonable and time based). For example I am planning to run a half marathon in May. I look up training plans and I download one that suits me. I know that by May that I will feel pretty good that I have achieved my goal. I imagine those feelings of achievement and euphoria. If your plan is to lose weight, look up a relevant way of eating that suits you (this is not a one-size fits all, it has to suit your lifestyle) and make a plan, imagine how it would feel to fit into those slimmer clothes you have stored away in your “thin wardrobe” (have you got “two” wardrobes?). Joining a weight watchers, slimming world or online facebook group such as the Malmesbury Keto Way of eating so you are not alone. Plenty of research shows that the more support you have from others, the greater chance of success.
If you want to resolve relationship crises, unravel those arguments having a mediator, counsellor, therapist on hand to help you move forwards helps you stand a better chance of finding that sought-after peace, with tools to support you and catch you mid argument so you can stop and see another’s perspective.
A great tip I learned is to imagine for a moment that person is you, or you are that person. See the world through their eyes, imagine how it really feels to be them. Then, and only then will you feel better equipped to manage disagreements. Feuds can be avoided or smoothed over if we all take the time to consider one-another.